2 Corinthians 12:7-10

For those of you who struggle with chronic pain I think you will relate with my story. Years ago when I was being plagued with Rheumatoid attacks I would find myself crying unable to lie down, stand up or sit for more than a few minutes at a time. My clothes hurt as they touched my skin and my entire body felt as though I was on fire. My husband couldn't sit beside me because any movement of the bed hurt. He couldn't hug me because of the terrible pain of my skin and soft tissue. He would sit on the floor by my bed with his head in his hands because he couldn't take the pain away and he had no way of comforting me. In those days all we could do was talk. You find out who you are when you are in pain for more than a day or a few hours. At first you can mentally handle it. I hate narcotics because they take away my ability to focus on resisting the pain. After two or three days my mind would become tired and my nerves frayed. I didn't want to be around anyone because I knew my quick irritation was difficult to manage and I didn't want to lose relationships. Todd and I often fought over stupid things because I needed space to deal with the pain and well husbands think space means emotional distance. I would study during those times because when my mind was clear. Distraction was all I had left when medicine, ice packs and heating pads had failed. One passage I kept finding intriguing was 2 Corinthians 12:7-, "in order that I might not choose to exalt myself, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan in order that he might beat me so that I would not exalt myself." This verse is controversial among scholars but I knew that God is in charge of interpretations and there had to be something out there to give me the clear meaning of "a thorn in the flesh". I found it on a Greek website, a university project that showed me other examples of the Greek word skolops, translated as thorn, other places in classic literature. In Homer and other places skolops was not a pesky little thorn it was a stake the Persians most notably drove through their enemies and left them there to die a slow painful death. In the Septuagint (Greek translation of the OT) this word was also used and in the same fashion. Imagine then a stake in the flesh. You get the picture. Now many doubt this is in reference to pain but Paul uses the word sarx, which means flesh. This phrase is only used in classic literature to describe terrible physical pain. Paul then had a painful affliction which he asked God three times to take away. This thorn in flesh Paul says was a messenger of Satan meant to beat Paul up. Just as God allowed Satan to bring physical suffering in Job's life, He did so in Paul's. Paul realizes after the third plea God's intent was unchangeable. He could have been angry at God and lashed out at everyone around him but Paul trusts God's judgment in the matter. That is hard to do, to trust someone in the middle of terrible pain, knowing they will not take it away. In Paul's case there was an underlying characteristic God didn't want to interfere in Paul's life. So pain made Paul and God talk when nothing else could ease Paul's pain and here was the outcome, "And He said to me, 'My grace is exceedingly great for you'; for this reason My power in physical weakness keeps maturing you. Therefore rather I sweetly will boast in my physical weaknesses in order that Christ's power may overshadow me." Paul wasn't being super spiritual he was learning daily the lesson that Christ's grace was meant to make us fly not just walk and when we think physical weakness makes us unusable God begs to differ. Will I make mistakes, cry, be tempted to give up? I will always have those things in my life trying to beat me up but in the end I can choose to fly or crawl.